Most of us coming out of IFB churches and organizations have to deal with family and friends. This separation can put a lot of strain on you, your spouse, your kids, and those around you. For some, family and friends have chosen not to associate with you and have “separated” from you. This is not easy.
Every situation is different but I have a few suggestions on what you can do based on my personal experience.
REMEMBER
o
How hard it was for you to leave.
o
Why it’s hard for most people to leave.
·
The loss of family and friends
·
The lies, gossip, misunderstandings, mean, and unchristian
things that will be done and said.
·
The assumption that they’re not following God
any more and maybe they weren’t saved in the first place.
·
It's all they have ever known, and change is
tough!
o
Some have spent decades in this type of church
and organization and don’t know anything else.
o
They might not be aware of the abuses in other
churches or possibly even their own church (lots of stuff is "behind the
scenes" or hidden).
o
They’re comfortable where they are with what
they know.
o
They might not see the problem.
o
If they do see a problem, they don’t know what
to do.
o
That you didn’t see clearly all the abuse until
you left.
o
Open to restoring relationships and friendships
o
Vigilant in pointing out abuse
o
Strong in your resolve to do what honors God
o
Prayerful – asking for deliverance of others from
the hands of abusers
o
To speak up for victims
o
To not attack others
Our goal is for our family to honor and please God, not please others. We just pray that we can keep shedding the light on abuse to bring about a change in the system of religion that we grew up in. We pray for change and we see it slowly as people leave the IFB for churches that love God and each other.
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