Offended Person
#1 – vertical forgiveness – why? Did the offended person
sin? I guess one way is to ask God to forgive the person, just like Jesus did
on the Cross for us but the offender would still have to accept that
forgiveness and so the sin must still be dealt with.
#2 – did the offender sin? Chuck Phelps calls it a “true
offense.”
Not all
offenses come from sin. Sometimes people feel they’ve been “sinned” against but
they have not but it’s still something that needs to be resolved. Mistakes,
misunderstanding, differences of opinion, or any other number of things can
cause problems between people. If we weren’t prideful, selfish, self-centered,
and sinful people, we’d be more understanding and have less problems but that’s
not going to happen.
If it is a
sin, we should also ask, “was it a crime?” “Did he break the law?” And then we
should deal with it accordingly.
#3 – “Confront those who offend you.” The beginning of Luke
17:3 states that “if a brother sins, confront him…” We seem to focus on the
person who was offended doing the confrontation but that does not need to be
the case. If I know someone has sinned against another person, I also have that
responsibility to confront the sinner.
a.
– obedience not revenge – as long as we realize that
consequences are not revengeful
b.
– for the good of the offender –what?
c.
– designed to edify – what?
I think I know
what he’s saying but confronting sin is for the good of the body of Christ. Dealing
with sin does not always seem good to the offender but if sin is dealt with, it’s
good in the long run, even with consequences.
#4 – forgive ….”unconditionally”… I may need to forgive unconditionally but that does not mean that
the consequences of the offense are removed and I’m afraid that the removal of
consequences is usually how this is interpreted.
#5 – Proverbs 15:1 has nothing to do with this statement
#6 – II Thess. 3:14-15 does not apply to this statement
either.
#7 – What does forgiveness have to do with looking for real
change from the offender?
The Offender
#1 – “own your offense” – good
#2 – “demonstrate your repentance” – “..might include…before
a civil magistrate.”
– this is the only time law
enforcement is mentioned and in such a strange way. If he broke the law, this
should not be optional and the offended has this option as well.
#3 – don’t expect to be “best friends” immediately